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What Do You Give The Genocidal Wingnut Who Has Everything?

Why, this handy nuke launcher/USB hub, that’s what! Cue the stampede of slavering 101st keyboard brigaders, Instawanker Glenn Reynolds at the head. The Register:

Nuclear War launcher (and USB hub) heads West

By Tony Smith

28th July 2006 14:57 GMT

The all-out nuclear war launch button Reg Hardware featured a couple of weeks ago – the gadget’s a four-port USB hub in its spare time – is coming to the US and will be available to buy on Sunday, we’ve learned.

US-based purveyor of products for the nerdily inclined GeekStuff4U apparently has a consignment of the red-button boxes winging its way westward from Japan even as we speak.

Fortunately, the silly gagdet, which comes complete with flashing lights, sound effects and authentic (apparently) power switches and arming key, can be shipped to Europe, according to GeekStuff4U’s website, for a modest ?23/$25.40 (?16) charge. You’ll find full details at teh company’s website.

The box itself costs ?49/$62 (?33.50) – a small price to pay, perhaps, to hook up your USB devices and launch the war to end all worlds… ?

In marketing, timing is everything.

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A Little Light Relief : Daydream Dinners

I’ve been sitting in the sun in the garden with Martin, who’s reading A Fine Old Conflict, an excellent book I must’ve read a dozen times ovr the past 20 years.

I commented that I’d love to have had dinner with Jessica Mitford, which then led onto fantasy dinner-party lists generally. A hackneyed meme yes, nevertheless it’s tried and tested, so here’s my fantasy dinner party:

Jessica Mitford, MFK Fisher, Nancy Mitford ( for added vicious family squabble value), SJ Perelman, Fanny Trollope, Stephen Fry, Evelyn Waugh (so Nancy’d have a shoulder to cry on), Jeremy Hardy (for Jessica), Armando Ianucci, TH White, Samuel Pepys, Linda Smith, EF Benson, Rosa Luxemburg, Martha Gellhorn and Ian Hislop, with Mrs Gaskell and Spalding Gray as first reserves.

Such a dinner party might be bit raconteur-heavy and liable to sound like a cacophony of parrots in full flight, but I think Stephen Fry’s charm and sheer chairmanly abilitiy would carry the day.

Now, about the food…

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US War Criminals To Walk Away Scot-Free

Er… isn’t not upholding the laws and constitution an impeachable offence?

WaPo reports that Bush’s attorney general Alberto Gonzalez is seeking to have retroactive legislation passed that will exempt US citizens from prossecution under the War Crimes Act of 1996 for past illegal acts, even when those acts were ordered by Bush or his minions :

[…]

An obscure law approved by a Republican-controlled Congress a decade ago has made the Bush administration nervous that officials and troops involved in handling detainee matters might be accused of committing war crimes, and prosecuted at some point in U.S. courts.

Senior officials have responded by drafting legislation that would grant U.S. personnel involved in the terrorism fight new protections against prosecution for past violations of the War Crimes Act of 1996. That law criminalizes violations of the Geneva Conventions governing conduct in war and threatens the death penalty if U.S.-held detainees die in custody from abusive treatment.

In light of a recent Supreme Court ruling that the international Conventions apply to the treatment of detainees in the terrorism fight, Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales has spoken privately with Republican lawmakers about the need for such “protections,” according to someone who heard his remarks last week.

Gonzales told the lawmakers that a shield is needed for actions taken by U.S. personnel under a 2002 presidential order, which the Supreme Court declared illegal, and under Justice Department legal opinions that have been withdrawn under fire, the source said. A spokeswoman for Gonzales, Tasia Scolinos, declined to comment on Gonzales’s remarks.

What’s this with the ‘obscure’? Is WaPo trying to frame this law (which has been on the statute books for ten years, through Bosnia and Somalia) as some little, unimportant bit of text not worth arguing over, let alone applying as actual law? The statute in question doesn’t look particularly obscure to me:

War Crimes Act of 1996 (as amended)18 U.S.C. ? 2441.

(a) Offense.–Whoever, whether inside or outside the United States, commits a war crime, in any of the circumstances described in subsection (b), shall be fined under this title or imprisoned for life or any term of years, or both, and if death results to the victim, shall also be subject to the penalty of death.

(b) Circumstances.–The circumstances referred to in subsection (a) are that the person committing such breach or the victim of such war crime is a member of the Armed Forces of the United States or a national of the United States (as defined in section 101 of the Immigration and Nationality Act).

(c) Definition.–As used in this section the term ?war crime? means any conduct–

(1) defined as a grave breach in any of the international conventions signed at Geneva 12 August 1949, or any protocol to such convention to which the United States is a party;

(2) prohibited by Article 23, 25, 27, or 28 of the Annex to the Hague Convention IV, Respecting the Laws and Customs of War on Land, signed 18 October 1907;

(3) which constitutes a violation of common Article 3 of the international conventions signed at Geneva, 12 August 1949, or any protocol to such convention to which the United States is a party and which deals with non- international armed conflict; or

(4) of a person who, in relation to an armed conflict and contrary to the provisions of the Protocol on Prohibitions or Restrictions on the Use of Mines, Booby-Traps and Other Devices as amended at Geneva on 3 May 1996 (Protocol II as amended on 3 May 1996), when the United States is a party to such Protocol, willfully kills or causes serious injury to civilians.

That looks pretty clear and unequivocal to me. I have a horrible feeling this is another one of those utterly immoral Gonzalez legal manoeuvres that will be ignored by the general public and the media, The torturers and rapists of Abu Ghraib, the military murderers of innocent women and childfren and the officers and politicians who ordered them to do it, all the way from Rumsfeld to the White House and Bush himself, can carry on doing whatever sadistic cruelties they like, secure in the knowledge there will be no consequences.

Untruth and injustice, it’s the American way.

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“But It’s A Dry Heat…”

I wouldn’t care if it were the most temperate place on earth – Phoenix Arizona is not somewhere I’d care to be just now.

Two Serial Killers Keeping Phoenix Residents Indoors

July 24, 2006

Los Angeles Times

PHOENIX — Summer nights used to be something to look forward to in the sweltering, sprawling metropolis of Phoenix.

Residents don’t dare leave air-conditioned homes and offices during the day, when temperatures routinely crack triple digits. When the desert sun goes down, parks fill up, joggers take to the streets and diners flock to outdoor tables at restaurants.

But this summer it’s a different story. Phoenix is being terrorized by two serial killers who have killed 11 people – after dark. Residents across the city are thinking twice before going out at night.

[…]

The victims, apparently chosen at random, have been men and women of all ages, and dogs. Both killers used guns.

Police call one of the attackers “The Baseline Killer,” after a broad boulevard that runs through poor neighborhoods and upper-middle-class suburbs where several of the victims have died.

He is suspected of killing five women and one man between the ages of 19 and 39 and committing eight robberies and seven sexual assaults.

The second killer is called “The Serial Shooter” by police and blamed for shooting at least 22 men and women whose ages range from 16 to 56. Five have died. The shots apparently come from a light-colored, four-door sedan. Police say it’s possible there is more than one person firing from the car.

Since May 2005, the shooter mostly has targeted people walking alone. But the victims also include people getting off buses at the end of workdays, and riding or pushing bicycles. The shooter is suspected of killing dogs on the street and is believed responsible for fatally shooting three horses on private property.

Dogs, eh? has anyone seen Pasteboy, Dr Frist or James Dobson recently?