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Baaaa

Published on February 21, 2007

New Zealanders flock to AdultSheepFinder.com
‘The World’s Largest Sheep Sex Personals Community’
By Lester Haines
Published Wednesday 21st February 2007 13:38 GMT

New Zealanders are flocking to an exciting new online initiative aimed at connecting sheep fanciers with their perfect date – AdultSheepFinder.com (NSFW).

The ovine-lovers resource is evidently a big hit down there in NZ, with around 100 per cent of the current worldwide membership of 20,333 coming from the set of Lord of the Rings.

The site boasts:

With AdultSheepFinder you can meet sexy sheep in your area at the touch of a button!

Find the right sheep for you from our extensive database and try to arrange with their owners for a sexy encounter!

Explore the erotic lifestyle of millions of sheeplovers through our Nude Sheep Photos, we even have hundreds of Sexy Webcam Sheep online everyday!

Marvellous. Just to rub it in, the wags behind this bit of NZ-baiting offer only “New Zealand” in the drop-down list of countries in their “Search Our Members” facility, and further advise: “If you would like to know more about Sheep Shagging we can recommend the following literature- Lonely Planet – New Zealand Edition.

Enraged New Zealanders can spare themselves a whois search on the domain, since the perpetrators of AdultSheepFinder.com are keeping their heads well down. Which means, of course, that they’re almost certainly Australian. ®

The Hand (Of Orlac) That Rocks The Cradle Rules the World

Published on February 19, 2007

I’m much obliged to the proud parents at Baby Roadies (“Diaper genies fucking rule!”) for uncovering an entirely new seam of hilarity for me to mine:

Ridiculous Parenting Items

Fireflies In The Cloud has a great list of totally retarded parenting products, including the horrifying Zaky Pillow:

I’m particularly taken with the Redneck Pacifier”:

More pointing and laughing at parental and marketing excess here.

In Vino Very Silly

Published on February 17, 2007

Ananova:

Man catches shark bare-handed

An Australian man who caught a 4ft shark with his bare hands says he only did it because he was drunk.

Phillip Kerkhof, 41, says he only realised what an ‘idiot’ he’d been when sobered up the next day.

The bricklayer had been to the pub for “a fair few vodkas” before going fishing with friends from a jetty at Louth Bay, on the Eyre Peninsula.

When he spotted the 4ft bronze whaler shark, he climbed down a ladder and followed the shark as it swam around the jetty.

Then he stripped off and launched himself into the water.

“It was a bit of a fluke – I just got behind the shark and I went for a big grab,” Mr Kerkhof said. “I guess you could say that it was the vodka spurring me on.”

After a short wrestle, Mr Kerkhof pulled the shark on to the jetty, to the cheers of his watching mates. His only injury was a scratch where the shark bit a hole in his jeans.

Mr Kerkhof said after sobering up the next day he realised that he had been “a bit of an idiot”.

Heeere’s Hitchy!

Published on February 17, 2007

Imagine waking up and finding an irate Hitchens on your doorstep…

The many and various Ann Althouses at Sadly No should take note that at least one wingnut is prepared to come round to your house and give you grief if you use his name as a pseudonym. He’s British, so no immediate worry, but he is Christopher Hitchens’ brother so you never know, this sort of thing could spread.

Like his brother Christopher, it seems Peter can’t take a joke, according to Guido Fawkes:

Peter Hitchens Stalking The Hitch

Something about the zeitgeist this month means that every successful blogger has to acquire a stalker. The Hitch has surpassed Guido in this sense. Whilst Guido has cyber-stalkers and comment trolls galore, the latent tension between “the real” Peter Hitchens the controversialist right-wing writer and the Peter Hitchens that writes for the Mail on Sunday is reaching hysterical levels. It was funny first time, but this round is bonkers.

First Hitchens complained to Yahoo that the Hitch was using the name Peter Hitchens in his Yahoo mail address. The complaint resulted in Yahoo removing his service. So he simply re-registered as therealpeterhitchens@… Then Guido got a phone call from the Hitch – “Peter Hitchens has just cycled up my drive”.

On his blog he elaborates –

I didn’t answer the door for a few reasons.
1, He didn’t ring the bell
2, I was wearing nothing other than my underwear
3, I thought “Fucking no way is that Peter Hitchens”

Having put a pair of pants on and gone to the door he was gone, If he hadn’t I would have invited him in. I have to say I admire his balls for doing it, the man has made a career out of touring some of the scariest places on earth and confronting far nastier folk than your humble blog host.

This “Hitch” admires the other “Hitch” but thinks he is a bit up himself and should lighten up, having said that , as long as he keeps threatening me he can fuck off and I will ratchet this up as high as he likes.

At first Guido thought the Hitch had been at the sherry, but no, he claims Peter Hitchens is moaning and making vague threats via email continuously. It is hard to see what course of action is open to him in law. There is no law against parody. In fact it seems to Guido if anyone is guilty of anything, it is Peter Hitchens for having a total lack of a sense of proportion. Cycling around peering through people’s letterboxes, he should be charged with travelling without a sense of humour. That’s stalkers for you…

American readers will know drunken popinjay and neocon journo Christopher Hitchens well – who can forget that lovely takedown of the former Lunchtime O’Booze by George Galloway? The Hitchens’ name has become a byword in the US for the louche Brit journalist abroad, but what you may not know is that Christopher also has a brother, Peter, who though once a red-shirted International Socialist organiser is now a paid demagogue for the UK’s rightwing, asylum-seeker-obsessed Mail on Sunday. Sample P. Hitchens headline: “Is this what they mean by ‘Muslim tolerance’?”. The other Hitchens also appears on numerous tv and radio current affairs programmes pontificating loudly and obnoxiously on terrorism and against Moslems and foreigners.

It’s this Hitchens that’s turned up on his imitator’s doorstep peering through the letterbox. So far this phenomenon’s confined to London, but in light of this new development in blogging the denizens of S,N might want to think about Althouse-proofing their homes and mailboxes.

Friday Comedy Double

Published on February 16, 20071 Comment

Some very jovial and public-spirited person has uploaded a whole bunch of clips from the all-black early-nineties comedy sketch show The Real McCoy, which featured many of the best comedians in Britain, some of whom, like Meera Syal and her fellow Goodness Gracious Me and Kumars star Sanjeev Bhaskar, have gone on to have major careers not only as actors and comedians but as novelists and playwrights.

You haven’t lived till you’ve heard Cyberman patois – here’s Dr Who dubbed for Jamaica:

And at last, more of Gina Yashere online: this is part of her recent sellout concert at the Hackney Empire. USAnians may recognise Gina Yashere from appearances on the BBC’s Mock The Week. Here she takes on the topic of suicide bombers and race – uncomfortable viewing, but wryly funny.