Things To Read And Look At

Well done to the Washington Monthly for devoting a whole issue to torture. But fine words butter no parsnips: what are the punditerati, minor beltway functionaries and party hacks planning on actually doing about it?

When beer’s as necessary to you as this you’ve got a problem.

But bad news for drinkers: beer may soon become a luxury, not a necessity:

A worldwide shortage of a key beer ingredient, hops, is causing beer prices to spike…Why the shortage now? It’s a classic sift of agricultural supply and demand. “There was a glut of hops, which caused low prices, which caused a lot of people to go out of business,” says Ralph Olson, owner of Hopunion, a Washington state supplier of hops to brewers across the U.S. “Now, there’s a shortage.”

The news gets more bitter for beer drinkers. Recent corn subsidies have lured surviving farmers away from hops, leaving only 118,000 acres worldwide dedicated to growing it. Worse yet, last year’s crop was thinned by a drought in Australia and excessive rains in Europe. “I’m scrounging around the world,” says Olson, “and there aren’t many out there.”

Via Mike The Mad Biologist.

This NZ ad answers a conundrum that has vexed humanity for far too long. How far from the beach can you go before swimwear turns into underwear?

Another conundrum – accident, murder or remorseful suicide? A senior Manchester police officer clears the UK government of involvement in CIA rendition flights; some time later evidence is admitted that shows that the UK actually did cooperate in US torture:

Todd’s investigation concluded last June that there was no evidence to back the claim. Last month, however, Britain admitted one of its remote outposts in the Indian Ocean had twice been used by the United States as a refueling stop for the secret transfer of two terrorism suspects

Classic mangled Ebay English, courtesy of Aimai at If I Ran The Zoo:

“There is really bona fide pottery barn outlet wares trading on eBay, pottery barn outlet wares that can emphasize any region of your dwelling. No, most of the product traded is not artificial, but you will have to be cautious. As with any rebate site there will be masses that desire to take reward of unaware shoppers. Below, I prefer to assist you to dialect your bathroom with this product. More….

Haven’t we all wanted to dialect our bathrooms at some time or other? I know I have.

Ooh, pretty. Stunning microscopic photography from the Wellcome Image Awards

For those masochists who insist on prodding the nagging bad tooth that is world news, heres’ something to keep your anxiety level at a screamingly high pitch. The New Yorker writes about the thousands of children, unpersons guilty of no crime, held in private US immigration jails: so much for bringing your poor, your huddled masses, yearning to be free:

Families were placed in former inmate cells. Each cell had a twin bed or a bunk bed with a thin mattress, a small metal or porcelain sink, and an exposed toilet. Generally, mothers and very young children stayed together in one cell, fathers in a separate cell, and older children in another. Husbands and wives were not allowed to visit each other’s cells. Masomeh told me, “For three days, Majid had a fever, and I wasn’t allowed to go to in and ask, ‘How are you?’ ” The cell doors were metal, and each had a window two inches wide; the floor and walls were bare, except for a shatterproof acrylic mirror. Doors were to remain open during the day, but they were wired with laser-detection alarms that were triggered when anyone came or went at night. A 2007 report by two advocacy groups—the Lutheran Immigration and Refugee Service and the Women’s Commission for Refugee Women and Children—noted that if a child sleeping in a separate cell woke up at night and went looking for his parents the alarm would sound, and only C.C.A. staff members were allowed to respond.

The guards at Hutto conducted as many as seven head counts a day, during which all detainees, even toddlers, were supposed to remain in place, usually by their beds, for as long as it took to complete the count. In practice, this meant that detainees might be in their cells twelve hours a day. (When head counts were not taking place, detainees could assemble in the common area within their “pod” of cells, where there were couches and two televisions.) Last March, an immigration lawyer named Griselda Ponce testified before the U.S. District Court in Austin about conditions at Hutto, and told of an occasion when the five- or six-year-old daughter of a woman she was interviewing had to go to the rest room. The captain on duty told the girl that she could not do so during a head count. Ponce said that the girl made “six or seven requests,” and was rebuffed each time; after about fifteen minutes, the girl “smelled of urine.”

As world recession and shortages start to bite and mass migrations intensify, this is only going to get worse.

On to infinitely less weighty issues: British newspaper critics reveal the worst that insulted stars have thrown at them, including an imaginary ball of fishhooks. Oh the poor loves. How they suffer.

What’s cooler than being cool? Ukeleles. Lord knows we need cheering up and if this doesn’t do it you haven’t a cheerful bone in your body and there’s no hope for you.

A brace of ukeleles for your lunch break: first the Ukelelelelelele (sorry, can’t stop spelling it) Orchestra of Great Britain does Isaac Hayes’ Shaft:

Who knew the ukelele could be goshdarned funky? Kiwi ukeleleists are no slouches on the toetapping front either: here’s The Wellington International Ukulele orchestra with Outkast’s Hey Ya:

Hah, that’s you earwormed.

Things To Read and Look At

Photographic foodscapes :(click for slideshow)

Suspect accused of killing kitten to save wife’s life

Protesters arrested in Dam Square on the grounds that they insulted the racist, poofy-haired ninny, right wing politician Geert Wilders (As if anything could be an insult to Wilders) Police took exception to the protestors’ placards (“Extremist – damaging to you and society”) but they won’t be prosecuted – the Public Prosecutor’s Office has said that it does not consider the posters distributed by the protesters insulting. Amsterdam police overstepped their powers, say critics. No change there, then.

Do the chroniclers of George W Bush’s life and presidency ever get to the real truth? James Wolcott thinks not. He also agrees with us bloggers that Bush’s presidency (especially Iraqi) sn’t, just some random disaster; instead it’s gone exactly as planned. And it isn’t over yet.

Half of all young Britons don’t know how to boil an egg.

I remember when news of Abu Ghraib broke, wondering both here and in comments at Digby about what horrors would be unleashed in their home communities when the brutal and brutalised veterans of Iraq finally came home. Well, now we know: from the NY Times comes

War-Torn: A series of articles and multimedia about veterans of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan who have committed killings, or been charged with them, after coming home.:

Town by town across the country, headlines have been telling similar stories. Lakewood, Wash.: “Family Blames Iraq After Son Kills Wife.” Pierre, S.D.: “Soldier Charged With Murder Testifies About Postwar Stress.” Colorado Springs: “Iraq War Vets Suspected in Two Slayings, Crime Ring.”

Individually, these are stories of local crimes, gut-wrenching postscripts to the war for the military men, their victims and their communities. Taken together, they paint the patchwork picture of a quiet phenomenon, tracing a cross-country trail of death and heartbreak.”

Speaking of eggs and guns:

Virgin to trial jet biofuel on Gatwick to Schphol flights

Why didn’t the government just leave her where she was? Supporters and friends in Cardiff.have set up an appeal fund to help Ama Sumani, a terminally-ill Ghanaian woman who was forcibly removed from hospital in the UK back to Africa because her student visa had expired, despite being on kidney dialysis and having no money for treatment in Ghana. The UK government minister responsible says her situation “is not unique”.

“We have had a call from a lady in Llandudno who says she is willing to pay for all the hospital bills.

“A woman from Rhiwbina (in Cardiff) rang and said “I am a pensioner, I don’t have much but I will contribute £100″.”

Such generosity is heartwarming – until you remember that this is exactly the world New Labour and their fellow neoliberals want us all to live in, a world in which an unproductive economic unit without the right paperwork has to rely on fhe benevolence of strangers just to be able to die in peace.

Things To Read And Look At

Martian glaciers flowing like molasses:

Life after Blair – what the slimy toads did next.

American catchphrases of the year, via Digby

Publishers attempt to rip off Flickr photographers

Paydirt! I keep my promises – here’s a lot of very pissed-off looking cats in Santa hats.

You can be sure that come the new year this annual mass insult to feline dignity will be avenged. Oh yes, it will be avenged.

Hate traditional festive expressions of patriarchal sky-fairy worship and fruitcake? All is not lost!Have a very noodly yule cake instead.

How science news gets distorted by the need to sell papers. “From Bambi To Moby Dick – how a small deer evolved into a whale” says the Guardian. Well, no, not quite, says Scientific American.

Arrgh! Britain’s top ten worst Christmas cracker jokes:

The Top 10 worst Christmas cracker jokes were:

1) What is Santa’s favourite pizza? One that’s deep pan, crisp and even

2) On which side do chickens have most feathers? On the outside

3) What kind of paper likes music? (W)rapping paper

4) What’s white and goes up? A confused snowflake

5) What do you call a woman who stands between two goal posts? Annette

6) Did you hear about the man who bought a paper shop? It blew away.

7) What’s furry and minty? A polo bear

8) How do snowmen get around? They ride an icicle

9) Who hides in the bakery at Christmas? A mince spy!

10) What do you call a penguin in the Sahara desert? Lost

Badum, tish! I thangyew…

Things to Read and Look At

The Sun twangs ‘like a guitar string’ – the mysterious Alfven waves predicted by scientists have been found by the Japanese solar observatory Hinode; they may be the source of the solar wind.. More Japanese space missions .

Well yes, absolutely, though Ian Hislop should’ve got one too: Top Gear’s James May wins Heat Magazine’s Weird Crush award

“When Heat asked May what the accolade meant to him, he replied: “It means I must be weird.””

Yes, indeedy.

Oh no they didn’t! Oh yes, they did! Panto stars are banned from throwing sweets to childfen in the audience, the culprit UK health and safety laws – no that’s not right, I sound like a shires Tory. It’s the insurance companies and their ridiculous risk-assessments.

i want a whole room walpapered with these flexible sheets of light – not only are they bendable and printable, they’re green, too.

Four-year-old saves mother with 999 call

A four-year-old girl dialled 999 when her mother collapsed, fetched her medicine – and changed into a Cinderella outfit so she looked smart for the trip to hospital. When Hannah Lerego had an asthma attack at home in Ross-on-Wye, Herefordshire, her daughter Olivia fetched her inhaler, stroked her hair to bring her round and described her symptoms to paramedics. Lerego, 30, said: “I don’t think I would be alive without Olivia. When they asked if my lips were blue she said they were pink like hers but turning purple and she knew that for sure because purple is her favourite colour.”

Awwww.

It’s the hypocrisy, stupid – Lingerie, cell phone pictures, anal sex, casinos, rope, stethoscopes, barebacking oh my! Homophobic US senator Richard Curtis shows his true colours.

Hmm. Haven’t I read these sentiments before?

Yes, she is “smart, tough and experienced”, according to the mantra recited the other evening. But is that why, according to the polls, three times as many Democrats want her to be president as her vastly experienced and surely no less deserving rivals Joe Biden, Chris Dodd and Bill Richardson combined? And would she ever have been in a position to run for senator from New York, let alone have a serious chance of becoming the country’s first woman president, had she not been mared to Bill Clinton? The answer, obviously, is no. Name recognition is all.

Oh yes. Here.

They know and we know that despite their considerable individual intellects and achievements it’s unlikely they would have become QC or Senator respectively, had they not gained name recognition and influence by being married to who they were married to. In the case of Clinton it’s enabled someone who’s been a Senator for barely five minutes, who’s never run any government body or even a city or state, to potentially step into one of the most difficult jobs in the world; in the case of Cherie Booth/Blair she’s had the opportunity to make massive amounts from speaking fees she would never have got as a simple human rights and employment lawyer;

And here.

“Hillary (Rodham Clinton) was able to position herself nationally because her husband was president. She didn’t have a political career beforehand and that isn’t my case,” Fernández de Kirchner said in an interview with CNN en Español, referring to her 30-year career in Argentine politics.

I’m just sayin…

Here’s one cuddly toy unlikely to be named Mohammed.

I bet a lot of Italian mothers are behind this policy – ”

noting that… a third of all men over 30 still live with their parents and that rental housing markets are depressed, [he] proposed a tax break worth the equivalent of about $1,400 for each man in his 20s who will finally leave Momma’s house”

The Year Without Toilet Paper (h/t Blazing Indiscretions)

{Edited slightly for style and content.]

Things To Read And Look At

Swimming with the squid:

I wish.

Give me your poor, your huddled masses yearning to be free..” Two stories on the mess that is global migration:

Home Secretary ‘covered up’ 1000s of illegal migrants working in Whitehall “…one worker was even sent to guard Gordon Brown’s car, while 11 more were at Scotland Yard. ” Normally I wouldn’t link to the fearmongering Mail but the oher papers are trying to act as though ths story doesn’t exist.

Are women’s rights human rights? asks Feministe, as a genitally-mutilated woman about to be forced into marriage is denied US asylum. No wonder people migrate illegally.

On a more self-involved note, do you live with a nerd? Are you a nerd? Maybe, like us, you’re a two nerd household? Read this and wince in recognition

The eerie sounds of the planets.

Look, I found a new kidney! They’ve got hearts and lungs, too.

Speaking of which President Bush has finally visited the wounded troops. He took his time. These photos (some graphic) say all you need to know about the man.

“Do you really want to hurt me?” In sleb news, Boy George’s private life gets a little out of hand…