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That Clinton touch

Blood and Treasure explains what makes Clinton into a truly popular president, in a way that neither the Bush that preceded him nor the Bush that stole the elections after him ever were or ever will be:

The thing about Clinton is that he responds to people like a huge baby, and people instinctively respond to him in the same way. Mrs T and all the other women went aaaaah and waved their cigarettes back at him. A couple of the lads gave him a double thumbs up and shouted geezer and wah-hay and suchlike. Then he got into a limo and was driven off, leaving an impression of a big cheeky grin in mid air. Now that?s a proper president.

In fact, no modern Republican president has ever had the personal popularity Clinton still has and damn few Democratic presidents either. Yes, I know you’re going to say “Reagan”, who does come close, but he never was as popular as Clinton was in both the US and abroad; you wouldn’t have seen random English people cheering Reagan walking around Machester. The others: Nixon, Bush, Ford have all been presidents people voted for in order for the other guy to not win, not people you want to have a beer with.

On the democratic side, Kennedy was the last president to be this popular, but 1) the height of his popularity was after he died and 2) it was a glamourous movie star’s popularity, not the average geezer popularity of Clinton. Johnson was as much a sourpuss as any of the bugfuckers on the other side, while Carter was a nice guy but not somebody you could be friends with. Clinton though is the guy next door, smart and succesful but not too succesful to be annoying, somewhat of a fatty, which helps, prone to liking the unglamours kind of women, which also helps. No fucking Marilyn Monroe for him, just some not very attractive intern, something most guys could see them doing themselves…

Yes of course, in his politics he was just as much of a ratfucker as every other president, but on a purely human level he is the most likeable post-war American president, still popular six years after he left office. That’s what drives the wingnuts mad and what makes them hate Clinton so much: they Know none of their guys could ever have that kind of popularity.

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When The Wind Blows Again

Omens, omens everywhere.

US ships’re massing in the Straits of Hormuz. John Bolton’s all over the media saying Iran is making a nuclear bomb, lying barefacedly despite all the evidence to the contrary – and Americans believe him. A mistranslation of Ahmahdinejad’s speech that makes him into a holocaust denier is now received wisdom, as is the message pushed by every major network news broadcast, every WH press conference, every Right-wing pundit and talk-show host – Islam’s bad, Islam’s fascist, Islam’s violent. Even the Pope’s on-message. Oh yes, and Iran is Islamic, so Iran’s violent too and therefore the fons et origo of all terrorism.

So Iran must die.

Add to this the Republicans continual failures at warfare. They failed in Vietnam, they failed in Central America, they failed in Gulf War I. They failed everywhere. Now here’s the biggest failure of all, Iraq, and they’re facing a ballot-box reckoning at home. The one thing Americans will not tolerate is failure – so what to do to make them look strong again? Why, pull out The Big One of course.

All the puzzle pieces are being locked into place for a pre-election October Surprise. But it won’t be a ground war, the US Army is too broken for that. Nope, this all about a nuclear strike. It’s time for all those born again Centurions that Bushco’s evangelical allies have been incubating in the USAF to prove their loyalty to the Commander in Chief (and of course to fulfil their god-given purpose as the bringers of the apocalypse, let’s not forget that) .

Those of us of a certain age see nuclear war as the ultimate abhorrence, the End of All Things, mutually assured destruction. All our lives from early childhood the mushroom cloud has been the shadow over our shoulders. The younger generation? Not so much; that’s the one good thing Reagan ever did for the world. But nuclear war is a brand that’s notoriously difficult to sell.

Hmmm. What to do?

Go back to marketing basics that’s what. Offer a new, improved, technologically shiny nuclear war, one that’s survivable, one that only hurts bad people, not like us, oh no, not like us.

Big media, panting at the promise of loosened ownership rules dangled by the GOP, is as usual, ready and waiting to soften up the public to accept what’s coming. Cue CBS’ new pilo, Jericho:

A drama about what happens when a nuclear mushroom cloud suddenly appears on the horizon, plunging the residents of a small, peaceful Kansas town into chaos, leaving them completely isolated and wondering if they’re the only Americans left alive. Fear of the unknown propels Jericho into social, psychological and physical mayhem when all communication and power is shut down. The town starts to come apart at the seams as terror, anger and confusion bring out the very worst in some residents. But in this time of crisis, as sensible people become paranoid, personal agendas take over and well-kept secrets threaten to be revealed, some people will find an inner strength they never knew they had and the most unlikely heroes will emerge.

Yay! American exceptionalism wins again! Even puny nukes cannot defeat it!

This deliberate decision to lie to the public about the consequences of nuclear war may be the most cynical of the things the US media-politico-military combine known as Bushco has ever done. Letter From Here (h/t Avedon ) puts it much more eloquently than I can:

More than 20 years ago, in the early years of the Reagan administration, loose talk about “survivable nuclear war” created a huge outcry, here and abroad. ABC produced a TV movie called “The Day After.” While operating within the constraints of network TV, the show tried to communicate some of the true horror of a nuclear war. The Reaganites learned their lesson and shut up.

Now, little more than two decades later, CBS is about to show nuclear war as something that happens elsewhere, off-camera except for a mushroom cloud or two on the horizon, nothing that can’t be survived by good people learning to work together in a small town far from Ground Zero. Yeah, right.

Call me a cynic, but I don’t think it’s any accident that this show is airing at the very time that the Bush administration is trying, through a disingenuous combination of leaks, diplomatic initiatives and gradually escalating threats, to build support for a preemptive strike — possibly with nuclear “bunker busters” — against Iran. And while they insist they haven’t made up their minds to go to war yet, chances are — based on past performance — they’ve already made their decision. It’s not a matter of “if,” but “when” — and how to sell it.

The neocon strategists know they don’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of selling another preemptive war to the public through rational argument. What they can do, without ever discussing the real issues, is make emotional appeals to their base, get them worked up, and then use them to bludgeon political opponents of preemptive war.

Who knows? “Jericho” might do the job. On the one hand, it stirs anxiety about nuclear war, and thus builds support for a “preventive war” against Iran. On the other hand, showing nuclear war safely going on in the background while people are fine and going about their lives in the foreground helps desensitize the audience to the horror of nuclear weapons and makes nuclear war less unthinkable. It helps erode taboos about a U.S. nuclear first strike — should that become necessary to get rid of those underground labs in Iran.

It just might work.

A little interesting sidelight: Jon Turteltaub, one of the show’s creators, appears to have had most of his projects since 1992 financed by Disney.

Well, well. What a surprise.

Read more: Middle East, Neocons, Bush, Bolton, Iran War, Nuclear War, Nuclear Strike, TV, Propaganda, CBS, Jericho, Disney

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The Mark Of The Beast

The Daily Mirror:

W-HAT has happened to Tony Blair’s forehead?

The premier’s policies may have caused a few noses to wrinkle in Labour ranks, but now the PM has developed the mother of all furrows on his brow.

Observers at the TUC conference were startled to spot a giant W etched on his skin. To some the wrinkle may be a sign that in troubled times the PM is growing ever closer to George W Bush and becoming Tony Dubya Blair.

I reckon he’s put his mark on him as some kind of weird, pre-joining the Carlyle Group fraternity rite. Ridiculous, you say? Well, it wouldn’t be the first time

NYT Nov 8, 1967
Branding Rite Laid to Yale Fraternity
Special to the New York Times

New Haven, Nov. 7 – A Yale fraternity accused by the student newspaper of burning its initiates with a brand will have its fate decided Friday by student fraternity leaders.

The fraternity, Delta Kappa Epsilon, could face the temporary closure of its house and a $1,000 fine resulting from alleged violations of rules previously passed by the Interfraternity Council, which consists of Yale’s five fraternity presidents.

The charges against Delta Kappa Epsilon were made last Friday in a Yale Daily News article that accused campus fraternities of carrying on “sadistic and obscene” initiation procedures.

The charge that has caused the most controversy on the Yale campus is that Delta Kappa Epsilon applied on “hot branding iron” to the small of the back of its 40 new members in the shape of the Greek letter Delta, approximately a half inch wide, appeared with the article.

A former president of Delta that [sic] the branding is done with a hot coathanger. But the former president, George Bush, a Yale senior, said that the resulting wound is “only a cigarette burn.”

[My emphasis]

Bush loves him some torture. Torture is mmmm-good. Tony doesn’t mind it either. Seems their little torture club now has its own brand.

Read more: Bush, Blair, Torture, Branding, War On Terror

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Thus I Refute Thee, Nanny Ogg

Well, here’s a blow to the veracity of traditional Lancrastian folk music:

Man needed surgery after sex with hedgehog

A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after he had sex with a hedgehog on a witchdoctor’s advice.

Zoran Nikolovic, 35, from Belgrade, says the witchdoctor told him it would cure his premature ejaculation.

But he ended up in an operating theatre after the hedgehog’s needles left his penis severely lacerated.

A hospital spokesman said: “The animal was apparently unhurt and the patient came off much worse from the encounter. We have managed to repair the damage to his penis.”

You can bugger the bear, if you do it with care,
in the winter, when he is asleep in his lair,
Though I would not advise it in spring or in fall–
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all.

If you’re feeling quite coarse, you can bugger the horse,
or the palfrey, the jennet, the stallion (with force),
You can bugger the donkey, the mare, or the mule,
Though to bugger the pony is needlessly cruel.

You can bugger the ox (if you stand on a box)
And vulpologists say you can bugger the fox,
You can bugger the shrew, though it’s awfully small–
but the hedgehog cvan never be buggered at all.

More, much more…

On the other hand , you could say the story just modifies the song slightly from The Hedgehog Can Never Be Buggered At All to The Hedgehog Can Be Buggered But Prepare For Some Time In Casualty.

Serves him right. I hope it hurt.

Read more: Weird Sex, Eastern Europe,Bestiality, Hedgehogs, Terry Pratchett, Discworld, Nanny Ogg, Hedgehog Song

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Firedoglake: racially insensitive

Look, I could care less about whether or not Bill Clinton invited enough bloggers of colour to his little shindig or not because frankly, anybody who thinks Clinton (either one) is the answer to America’s problems is an idiot anyway,[1] but I have to say that some of the fallout has been interesting… And I don’t mean the Ann Althouse thinks breasts are inherently sinful or whatever: she has to learn to deal with her own hangups and not bother the rest of us.

What I’m talking about is the response to Liza of Culture Kitchen, who first pointed out there were no Black or Asian bloggers at the event. It seems that one Trex of Firedoglake was less than happy with this and decided to teach her a lesson by, well, by showing he could be a much bigger asshole about it all than she supposedly was. Some attempt was made at refuting her argument, but mostly it was just willy waving of a particular petty sort, with the worst being this paragraph:

So, Liza, dear, before you go assailing your betters and making Jane stand in for every blond white woman who ever pissed you off, maybe you should head back to eighth grade English and, you know, learn to spell and to write in a linear fashion. Although judging from your other posts that I read, mediocrity may be a chronic condition for you. Still, I bet you could get a long way on locker-slamming and hair-flipping among the other 13 year olds. Hell, it got you your own post here tonight, courtesy of Yours Truly, and I guess that?s something. You just might have a future in this blogging thing, although I think you might be more at home on LiveJournal or MySpace where you can post lots of photos of yourself to distract from your decidedly tepid prose and numerous grammatical faux pas.

Now is it just me, or does this have some nasty racist undertones? The big white man putting the little Black woman in her place? Hell, I might just be reading too much into this and this is just “Trex” sucking up to Jane Hamsher by rabidly attacking a critic. It all certainly reads like the prose of an underling or stooge hoping his ferocity in defending her will impress the boss, not an uncommon phenomenon amongst blogs popular enough to form a clique.

In its own way then Trex’s “defence” helps confirm Liza’s original criticism. The event wasn’t inclusive and as soon as Liza drew people’s attention to it, if abrasively, she was attacked in a mauch more nasty manner than she had done in her own post, with the complaint (a valid one, as far as I can tell) lost in the shuffle.
Nice going.

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[1] They still support the fucking War on Iraq!