{"id":4682,"date":"2013-06-29T17:01:36","date_gmt":"2013-06-29T22:01:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/?p=4682"},"modified":"2013-06-29T17:01:36","modified_gmt":"2013-06-29T22:01:36","slug":"fandom-really-should-clean-our-act-up","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/2013\/06\/29\/fandom-really-should-clean-our-act-up\/","title":{"rendered":"Fandom really should clean our act up"},"content":{"rendered":"

\nSo sick and tired of this shit happening in my fandom<\/a>:\n<\/p>\n

\n

\n3. Moments later, another guy, a fellow writer, hugs me tenderly from behind, though I do not know him. When I turn, startled, to protest, he says \u201cYou have the greatest smile. It just makes me want to hug you.\u201d I\u2019m doomed to avoiding him for the rest of the con, because he\u2019s always wherever I am, charging at me with open arms, hugging me in elevators and moving at me to hug basically just wherever I go. It\u2019s gross. He becomes known to my swiftly formed girl posse as The Hugger in the Hat. And when I say hugger, I mean full body contact with erect bits against my thigh. I don\u2019t report him. I\u2019m new to the scene. I feel awkward. I\u2019m used to being harassed in the world. This is bad, but it\u2019s not insane in terms of how much wrong attention I get from creeps in cities. So, I don\u2019t report.\n<\/p>\n

\n4. What Cherie Priest says in her post on this is true. We form protective posses. Descriptions of creepers are traded like cards. Women say things such as \u201cDo you need back up when you walk through that room?\u201d \u201cWhat color is his shirt?\u201d \u201cOh, I saw The Hugger In The Hat in there \u2013 I\u2019m getting between you and him.\u201d\n<\/p>\n

\n5. Conversely, when I complained about The Hugger anecdotally to men, most of them said he was just clueless and didn\u2019t mean to creep me out, and that if I was clear that I didn\u2019t want to be hugged, I wouldn\u2019t be, because The Hugger was a nice guy. Don\u2019t get me wrong. Most men are great. But I think most guys have also not been witness to a lot of this. Creepers wait til you\u2019re with your girls, or alone. Because Creepers calculate.\n<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

\nBoth the actual harassement Maria Dahvana Headley experienced and the dismissal\/justification of it should not happen. It’s 2013, not 1973 and even in fandom, even when you are a famous science fiction writer, this sort of behaviour is beyond the pale and we should not put up with it any longer. Nobody should have to worry about how and whether to file a formal harassement report against an editor<\/a> when going to a con.\n<\/p>\n

\nFor those of us who aren’t douchenozzles, nor likely to be the victim of harassement, what we should do is watch out for it and be supportive, not dismissive, of those who do suffer from it. This can be hard, but that’s no excuse not to.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So sick and tired of this shit happening in my fandom: 3. Moments later, another guy, a fellow writer, hugs me tenderly from behind, though I do not know him. When I turn, startled, to protest, he says \u201cYou have the greatest smile. It just makes me want to hug you.\u201d I\u2019m doomed to avoiding […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[94,305,22],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4682","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-feminism","category-geekdom","category-science-fiction"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4682","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4682"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4682\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4683,"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4682\/revisions\/4683"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4682"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4682"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cloggie.org\/wissewords2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4682"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}