Anime

With episode 12 we reach our destination, the end point the series has been working towards since Kimari met Shirase for the first time, the place where Shirase’s mother was last seen alive and you’re not crying, I’m crying.

When an episode foregoes the normal opening and ending theme, you know it’s going to be something special, that it needs all the space it can get in its twentythree minute runtime so even the three minutes spent on them is begrudged. And starting with a flashback to Shirase in middle school, you know exactly what this episode is going to be about. For most of the series the fact that Shirase’s mother had died on the previous expedition had been easy to ignore as anything other than the motivation driving her to go to Antarctica herself. It’s only when she was talking to Gin, her mother’s best friend, that some of the reality of what her death meant to Shirase slipped out. But now the expedition is going back to the last place where Shirase’s mother was seen alive and Shirase is unsure whether she wants to go there.

When Shirase only response to Gin’s offer to take her to the place where her mother died is that she’ll think about it, her friends start worrying about her again. But they’re not quite sure how to talk about it. Finally, as they’re preparing dinner together, Shirase starts to explains how she’s feeling. That’s she’s not particularly sad or upset like she thought she would be if she went to Antarctica.That she feels too normal even, the only things she can think of being that, ah, it sure does look a lot like the pictures. In fiction grief is always shown as this incredibly emotional process, full of crying and huge emotional outburst, but the reality is that it can often leave you feeling numb, as Shirase is here, unsure of what to do.

It’s not surprising that it’s Kimari who keeps pressing Shirase; she’s still the closest to her and certainly the most tactless, blunt of the four. She reminds her of the sacrifices she made to come here, how hard she worked to get on the expedition. How she talked about how her mother was waiting for her in Antarctica. She’s so blunt that both Hinata and Yuzu feel compelled to stop her.

Shirase knows all that, she knows that it would be strange to stop now she has come so far in search of her mother. But. But once they get there, there’s nowhere left to go. That it will be the end and if nothing changes, she’s afraid she’ll keep feeling the way she does right now. Still waiting for her mother, still unable to process her grief and get closure. This was the first time I felt the tears threatening to come out, just as Shirase’s friends felt hearing that. We’ve seen it in flashbacks, we’ve heard her talk obliquely about it with Gin, but this is the first time that Shirase admitted to her friends how difficult she has found it to cope with the death of her mother.

What I really appreciate about Sora yori mo Tooi Basho is that even in this episode the mood is not kept unrelentlessly sombre. There’s still room for humour. When Shirase doesn’t show up for the barbecue to celebrate the upcoming trip to the observatory site, one of the adult expedition members asks the other three if they don’t feel the need to talk to her about it. Hinata replies that sometimes you need to give somebody the space to decide for herself. To which the woman replies that it’s a sign of a good friendship that you can give each other space like this. Cue a happily beaming Yuzu: “We’re good friends!”

After another heart to heart with Gin, where they both share their sorrow about Takako’s death and how you can talk about dying wishes and doing what she wanted, but you can never be sure, Shirase has a sleepless night thinking about what to do the next day, if she’s going or not. She takes out her treasure, that one million yen that set everything in motion back in episode one and lies the bank notes down. “Cleaning. Cashier. Moving. Newspaper delivery.” Each not laid down is testament to Shirase’s efforts to go to where her mother is, knowing full well she won’t be seeing her alive. In doing so, she regains the determination to take that final step and she joins the expedition to the observatory site. Again a scene which I felt tears threatening.

Speaking of humour: Hinata and that bloody frozen banana. With Shirase’s indecision resolved, the trip to the observatory site is relatively free of the tension of the rest of the episode. Instead we get a bit of a respite, as the girls’ usual routines restablish themselves during the trip, hours of slow travel during which they have nothing better to do than play cards. Inbetween reminders of how deadly Antarctica can be, as the expedition crew explain how easy it would be to never get back during a blizzard. They also spot a sun pillar, which looks a bit familiar.

As the expedition settles in for the night and a blizzard rages around them, Shirase asks Gin how this is how it was like when her mother disappeared. Gin then tells her the story of how her mother was walking behind her, she suddenly realised she was gone and how they searched for her to no avail. It’s another emotional conversation between the two, but it’s clear to see how much they’ve both grown towards each other in these, how much more at ease they are with each other even during such a heavy conversation. The same goes for the chat Shirase has with Kimari later that night, who thanks her for taking her to Antarctica. Thanks to her, Kimari got the most out of her youth. It confirms to Shirase that she’s no longer alone, that she no longer needs to be alone, but has friends who can she can share her burdens and her joy with.

And when they finally arrive at the observatory, it’s her friends that don’t take no for an answer, who go looking for something, anything as proof that Shirase’s mother, that Takako had been there. Shirase herself says it’s unnecessary, that it’s okay but they persist. Kimari is the most insistent, but it’s Hinata who finds what they’re looking for: a completely frozen over laptop. She hands it to Kimari, who wipes off the ice to find a picture on the laptop lid, a picture of Takako and Shirase, one that must’ve been taken by Gin. They hand it over to Shirase, smiling and tearing up at the same time and so am I.

And then they’re back at base and Shirase is in her room, trying to start up her mother’s laptop and it boots. After one failed attempt, she enters her own birthday as the password and it opens, the email programme starts up and it starts receiving mails. And it’s all the mail she had sent to her mother, starting from when she was still alive and they keep on coming, a hundred, two hundred, five hundred, well over a thousand. And Shirase let’s out a strangled sob and starts crying, as do her three friends waiting for her in the hallway. As did I, the moment I saw that first mail being received. That’s grief in the digital age. Click back in your own mail archives far enough and see the (unread) mails of a loved one that had died, or check their own mail account and see the spam and mailing list messages still come in years after she died. It’s heartbreaking, one of the most emotional moments in anime I’ve ever seen.

This episode could’ve so easily been smaltzy or overtly dramatic, but it completely succeeds in both showing Shirase’s grief, her friends compassion as well as the more subdued sorrow of Gin and Kanae, coming back to the place where they lost their best friend. In writing this post, I’ve rewatched this three-four times and the feelings it stirs are still the same. As good as the rest of the series had already been, had this gone wrong it would’ve doomed it entirely. But it stuck the landing and the last episode can be the victory lap. This is already a 10/10 anime, anime of the season, a modern classic.

In the previous episode Kimari was so foolish to take off her face mask outside. This episode she learns that her friends will laugh at her for getting a ridiculous sunburn in Antarctica. (As will her family later.)

It’s almost New Year’s Eve and the Antarctica expedition has set up a live stream connection to Japan. During the test setup, three friends of Hinata show up, which she’s surprised about until she sees them on screen, after which she immediately covers the camera and claims a cramped leg, running away from the test. After the opening, we cut to an interlude with Gin and Kanae as they discus having the final piece of equipment needed to start working on the observatory Takako wanted to create and how dangerous the place is where they want to set it up, as that’s where Takako died. The next scene has the girls stamping new year’s card for their friends and family at home, but Hinata only has one for her manager at the convience store. When questioned about it, she ran off to the toilet, Shirase following here and discovering her outside, expressing her rage.

Throughout this episode it’ll be Shirase who keeps pressing Hinata, as she also did in episode 6, when Hinata had lost her passport and Shirase was adamant to reschedule all their flights. She keeps asking Hinata what’s wrong, keeps worrying about her, doesn’t let up until she knows what’s going on and insists on helping her once she knows what happened. It’s fitting that it’s Shirase who’s helping Hinata here, what with her somewhat blunt and plenty stubborn personality. Yuzu is too quiet and perhaps not socially clued enough for it and Kimari tends to accept people at face value, though as we saw last episode with Yuzu, she can be clueful when she wants to be.

Before we get into the meat of Hinata’s problems, a quick but important detour. Shirase plays mahjong with Kanae, Gin and another woman and wipes the floor with them, prompting Kanae to ask if she played it with her mother. When Shirase answers that she did, she mock despairs and says that they cannot win against the daughter of Gin and Takako. It’s only an offhand, joking remark, but combined with what we saw in episode nine it’s not hard to believe there’s a kernel of truth in this. Gin and Takako at the very least were best friends, might’ve been romantically engaged and Takako made a point of involving Gin with Shirase.

When a mail to Shirase comes through on the station’s general mail account, Shirase hears about it during the mahjong game and decides to read it and is caught doing so by Hinata and the others. Though feeling guilty for having done so, she still pressures Hinata into telling them what’s the matter, telling her she worried about her. So Hinata tells how she got ostracised at the track club for being selected for the big meet over the third years, how she quit the club but kept spreading rumours, which is why she dropped out of high school. That now the people who dropped her when she came under fire wanted to make up now she had gone to Antarctica.

The atmosphere among the four girls the next day is tense, as everybody is reflecting on Hinata’s story and feeling sad for her. Which in turn prompts her to call them out on it. Why do you think I went to Antarctica? Because there’s nothing here and all those problems mean nothing here, she says. This convinces Yuzu and Kimari, who are glad to forget about it if that’s what Hinata wants. Shirase though is not convinced. She knows better than the others how Hinata acts, prefering to keep up a brave face and forget about her worries, rather than having to burden other people with it.

Shirase confronts Hinata again in private, saying that she couldn’t stomach it, smiling to people who hurt her so, who suddenly wanted to apologise without acknowledging what they’d done. Hinata answers that she isn’t Shirase though. Though she says that Shirase’s insistence and pushiness is annoying, it’s clear that she’s touched by her friend’s devotion and anger for her. She thanks her for bringing her along to Antarctica and that her hands and support are enough for her.

And yet… Shirase still isn’t convinced. Just before the actual broadcast begins, she asks to speak to Hinata’s “friends” and starts laying into them for expecting Hinata to be upset and permanently damaged by her experiences, but that this wasn’t true, that every day she was taken a new step into a new life At first shocked, Kimari joins in, saying that now she was in Antarctica doing things they could never dream off and that she didn’t need them anymore.

As Hinata, slightly embarassed, tries to cut Shirase off, Yuzu is having now of it. “It’s fine! It’s friendship! A nice reminder of last episode and how much of a pure cinnamon roll she is. Shirase continues by stating that, unlike Hinata, she’s a real jerk and not afraid to let them know how unwelcome they are for hurting her friend. Everybody starts crying, seeing Shirase defending her friend so forcefully, but they’re mostly happy tears. It’s only fitting that after such a draining, emotional scene, the episode ends as the year ends and the four bash away their bad thoughts the traditional Japanese way, by hitting a drum can with a wooden beam:

The girls finally set foot on Antarctic soil, in time for Yuzu to learn an important lesson about friendship.

It only took them ten episodes, but now the hard work begins for real. The supplies have to be brought in, equipment to be refurbished, the base to be made liveable. And the girls have to do their share too. The good news is that they’re going to sleep in the “Lakeside Hotel” and they’ll have a room of their own each. Which comes as a relief to Shirase, Yuzu and Hinata, no longer having to share a room with Kimarin and her annoying habit of talking in her sleep. Something I can relate to, as I allegedly do so myself. They also get their first encounter with a real live penguin, which causes Shirase to flip out in excitement to the extend they have to physically restrain her. Through all this tomfoolery Yuzu has been a bit distant, the reason for which is soon revealed.

She’s gotten a text from her mother and agent that she’s been accepted for a part in a television drama, but worries that this means she won’t be able to hang out with the other three anymore. Hinata, ever the most practical of the girls, points out that they’ll be living separately again after the expedition returns home anyway. Yuzu protests and Kimarin tries to reassure her by stating they’re all best friends anyway. When Yuzu doubts this, Kimarin seems at the verge of crying until Hinata stops her. As Yuzu continues to wonder when they became best friends, when they weren’t when she first them, she becomes convinced it was when she was in Hokkaido and starts sulking about it.

As her friends talk her out of it and tell her they didn’t do anything without her, she wonders when they knew they were friends and why they never asked her to be theirs. Their friendship might be obvious to Hinata, Kimari and Shirase, but Yuzu needs more formal assurances. It makes sense. Before she first met the other three after all, she had never had had real friends, her one attempt in high school a failure. There had also been hints that she’s a bit more, eh logical than the others, less able perhaps to understand these sort of things without formal declarations.

In any case, it leaves her friends somewhat bewildered on how to handle her. When Hinata wonders if Yuzu was waiting for them to ask her, Shirase suggest just doing so, to which Hinata replies as above. But no fear, Kimari has a plan. If she’s up to it. In the meantime, they still have work to do, as Christmas approaches and preparations for the Christmas party are being made. Yuzu has some doubts about the importance of Christmas, but meeting a fan of hers at the base puts her at ease and she decides to take the role.

But she’s still anxious about her friendship with the other three girls, something that all their reassurances haven’t been able to assuage. Therefore she asks them for a favour, to sign a formal friendship contract so she can be at ease that they are friend. This time Kimari does start crying, running up to Yuzu and hugging her. Most people would know that something like a friendship contract is doomed to failure, so it says something about Yuzu that she thinks this could be a solution, something that goes beyond her isolation as a child idol. Rather, her seeming inability to read this sort of social clue. her anxiety about not having a message replied to immediately, it may be that she’s on the spectrum, is somewhat neuroatypical.

In any case, her friends care enough for her to prepare a surprise birthday party after the Christmas party has run its course, all organised by Kimari. It turns out that Yuzu’s birthday took place during that part of their trip they were all too busy puking their guts out. So they decided to celebrate it once they were in Antarctica and baked her a cake.

Seeing Yuzu tear up out of gratitude and talking about how this is the first time friends had actually celebrated her birthday made me choke a bit as well. She’s such a pure cinnamon bun and she deserves this happiness. Ultimately the efforts of Kimari, Shirase and Hinata are not in vain and Yuzu accepts they are really friends. In a lesser series this could’ve come over as sappy and trite, but the way Sora yori mo Tooi Basho does it is so well done because it comes straight from the characters themselves, isn’t forced on them and importantly, it’s done with humour.