Hate localisation. Hate IP based geolocation. Hate Hate Hate.

Google has long been localising its various websites and services, which I find incredibly annoying: if I want to read Dutch news I’ll ask for and I don’t want my search results tailored to where I am. Now as you know, Google bought Blogger a while back and has now localised blogspot as well and now every time I want to Alicublog, I’m directed to http://alicublog.blogspot.nl/ rather than http://alicublog.blogspot.com/. Suspicious minds have said that Google has introduced this to be able to selectively close down access to controversial/”illegal” blogs while keeping this censorship invisible outside the target country. For the moment it certainly doesn’t possible, other than using a VPN connection to the US or by masking my IP address in some other way, to get round this autoswitching.

And that has fucked up the commenting systems of quite a few blogs I follow, as the Echo system they depend on is not smart enough to understand foo.blogspot.com is the same as foo.blogspot.nl. So I can’t read the comments at Alicublog, I can post comments at the *.nl version, but nobody will every read them…

Fuckers.

What they did to Tomb Raider

Remember 1996? I do. At the time I was still pretending to work on my degree, but to be honest a lot of time in the computer rooms at the Vrije Universiteit was spent reading Usenet and playing games. And 1996 was a hell of a year for games: first we got Duke Nukem 3D, which whole computerlabs played with gusto, then a little later we had Quake, which really was the shit. Many a Thursday night was spent deathmatching to about 10:30, then quickly moving on to the local student pub to be there just before the end of happy hour, get thirty beers and spent the rest of the night drinking them…

Inbetween those two blockbusters there was another little noticed game, which you may have hear of, something called Tomb Raider. I remember getting the demo off an English game magazine, together with the Quake demo and wasting a weekend alternatively playing those. For me it was a pleasant distraction inbetween Duke nukem and Quake, but nothing more.

Sandra though loved Tomb Raider: she had the whole series, both on pc and later on PS2, every once so often replaying her favourites. I never have much patience for puzzle games and anything where you have to carefully guide your character past a series of traps; I’d rather point and shoot, but Sandra was good, very good even. She liked that sort of game anyway, but the fact that Tomb Raider had a female protagonist, who bigboobed as she was was also competent, no-nonsense and never in need of a man to rescue her, was a large part of its appeal.

So she’d be incredibly disappointed by what the developers have in store for the latest installment:

“When people play Lara, they don’t really project themselves into the character,” Rosenberg told me at E3 last week when I asked if it was difficult to develop for a female protagonist.

“They’re more like ‘I want to protect her.’ There’s this sort of dynamic of ‘I’m going to this adventure with her and trying to protect her.'”

[…]

“The ability to see her as a human is even more enticing to me than the more sexualized version of yesteryear,” he said. “She literally goes from zero to hero… we’re sort of building her up and just when she gets confident, we break her down again.”

In the new Tomb Raider, Lara Croft will suffer. Her best friend will be kidnapped. She’ll get taken prisoner by island scavengers. And then, Rosenberg says, those scavengers will try to rape her.

“She is literally turned into a cornered animal,” Rosenberg said. “It’s a huge step in her evolution: she’s forced to either fight back or die.”

So they’re doing an origin story for Lara Croft (again) where they’ve made her deliberately younger, less competent and more vulnerable because because there’s no way boys would play a game with a female protagonist otherwise and it’s not that girls play Tomb Raider and the success of the original series with both male and female gamers, neither of which group had any problems indentifying with Lara, be damned. It’s typical moronic executive thinking, imported from Hollywood, where a supposed core demographic is pandered too while everything that made the game a success in the first place is leached out.

To use an attempted rape as motivation is just the rancid cherry on this turd cake. It’s insulting, it’s insensitive and it’s one more tool to undermine positive female rolemodels. Male heroes can go on adventures just because, female heroes need to be raped first. (And when male heroes do need a dark secret hidden in their past to spur them on, stuff their girlfriend in a fridge.) Hey, but at least her boobs are less big now!

Truth is, Tomb Raider doesn’t need an origin story, it just needs to be Lara Croft raiding tombs, preferably in interesting parts of the world filled with clever traps and nicely detailed wildlife for her to kill; having a plot is optional. Make the gameplay good, the settings lush and the puzzles hard but not impossible and people will buy it; that’s all.

Silicon snake oil

Two prime examples, courtesy of two of the best communities on the web. First, through Unfogged, some wannabe Steve Jobs douchecopter explains how the Ipad means we all need to be excellent at our work or be unemployed forever:

And if you’re good at what you do, then I suggest making a plan to be excellent — or quitting and joining the 99% at Occupy Wall Street.

I think the polarization of wealth is as much about the “age of excellence and the end of good” as it is about the criminal Wall Street gambling d-bags who rape and pillage our economy with every trade they can. Certainly the financial crimes of Wall Street did damage, but what damage does putting out average products do to our economy?

It’s just the usual twaddle on how we all need to adopt to the increasing demands of the modern workplace yadda yadda, dressed up in New Shiney Apple snake oil, written by somebody who hasn’t done a day of honest work in his life.

Then at MeFi, another jerkfacewanting to do away with computer science departments at university because they’re not quite vocational training courses, demonstrating he has no clue about what universities actually do:

One good example is cited in an awesome book on educational reform called Crisis on Campus by Columbia professor Mark Taylor: one of the most pressing problems that humanity has today is obtaining clean drinking water. Yet no university has a Department of Water. Why is this? Because campuses are an endless successions of zero-sum games: the formation of a new department necessarily means that resources must be taken away from existing departments, so existing departments viciously defend the status quo, even when that doesn’t align with reality. Computer science education has not been in alignment with reality in a long, long time.

This is just hopelessly clueless about how universities work and like the earlier example, this guy too is obsessed by being the best, by seeking simplistic, business driven solutions to complicated problems. It’s a handicap in the geek mindset, something these silicon snake oil salesmen make good use off.

Pointless fetishm of obsolete technology

This irritated me:

This essay is the first piece of writing I’ve done by hand, start to finish, since 5th grade, 1992. I drafted it using a Uniball Signo pen and black notebook while sitting at my desk. I edited it in the same way. When it came time to enter the essay into the computer so that it could appear on this website, I typed it in almost exactly as I’d put it down on paper.

[…]

Overall I think there’s greater variance in the quality of the writing I produce by hand. The good stuff I write is cleaner, more honest, less stylized, more well-considered. The bad stuff is more obvious, more ponderous, more self-involved, maybe weirder. In fact, this is definitely one of the weirdest pieces I’ve ever written. Writing on the computer drives my writing towards some average value — I think/write/delete/think/write until I have something that’s decent but maybe less vibrant than the ideas as they were conceived in my head.

What annoyed me is not so much the fact that this guy has rediscovered writing in with pen and paper, but the unconscious elitism behind it. Reading between the lines you can see the idea being pushed that writing longhand is more natural and simpler than writing on a computer, but in fact more people find it easier to use a pc to write: just look at the explosion of writing on the internet.

In contrast, writing in longhand is hard work physically cramps your hand, is less easy to edit, less easy to share, in short less accessible for most people. It’s no wonder most people didn’t bother with it after school until the computer and internet came along and made it easy to share your thoughts. This democratisation of writing is a good thing and I hate to see some hipster quest for authenticity endanger it.

Quick tip: get the fun pass



So last Summer, nine year old Caine was stuck at his dad’s used car parts shop and bored, so he started making classic arcade games out of cardboard boxes. He got a little bit obsessed with it to tell you the truth, in that way nine year old kids can get obsessed over their hobbies. There was just one little problem: he only had one customer and would’ve liked to see more people play his games. But luckily that solitary customer was geek/film maker Nirvan Mullick and he set out to give Caine the best day of his life.

They can be wearisome sometimes, self congratulatory and up themselves, but sometimes they show that things can get better with geeks. This was a brilliantly sweet thing to do for one lucky nine year old.